1st Day of Chemo - April 29

I woke at the usual 7:00 am today, which is routine for me at the Larock house as I begin to prepare for another day of work.

However, today I wasn't going to work. Instead it was my first day of Chemotherapy at Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto.

Our son Trent had asked the day before if he could join his mother and I on the adventure to Toronto. I, as well as his mother, thought it would be a good experience for the 11 year-old to witness in person that his father was not going to be hurt in anyway today but rather that the medicine he would receive will be given to help slow down the cancerous disease.

The day started out as usual with me anxious to get on the road while Trent and Jennifer took their sweet time. The trip was the usual 1.5 hours in length with, of course, two pee breaks in between. Once for Mom and the second for Dad.

When we arrived at PMH, I knew exactly where we were going. It's a place that I have been many times before and if you've never been there, I hope you never have to go. Don't get me wrong the Hospital is a wonderful place but from the first time I stepped through the door I've been amazed at the fact that this Hospital services ONLY patients with cancer. And there isn't just a few people in the lobby. There must be thousands in and out the door everyday. Not to mention the number of patients in the rooms upstairs. It certainly is an eye opening experience to say the least. And a very sad one as well.

Off topic - One day I read the many different types of cancers followed at the PMH. I was amazed at everything from lung, kidney, breast (which are the obvious) but then there is throat, testicle and eye cancer. Can you imagine having eye cancer? That would be horrible. But as I found out later when talking with my doctor, eye cancer is perhaps one of the lucky forms of cancer to have because you see with eye cancer, once you remove the eye... the cancer is... gone. You can always live and even drive with one eye.

Back to chemo day 1... After you arrive at the Daycare Chemo Clinic there tends to be a lot of what 'normal' people would call waiting. For us 'not normal' people this is called hospital patience. The problem is that there are so many people with cancer and more than 100 different types of chemotherapy drugs that you simply have to wait your turn. We waited approximately an hour to see the nurse who would administer my drugs. He was a nice fellow, Mike, who looked a little like Eddie Murphy, so Trent said. Jennifer and Trent watched and listened, as Mike, read through the many side effects that can take effect following Chemo. I knew the list because I've done a little research. I'm usually good with side effects which should help in my treatments. I didn't have many with radiation and I am hoping the same with Chemo. I was a tad mesmorized by the amount of times Mike mentioned nausea and vomitting because quite honestly I really hate doing it.

Then came time for Mike to adminster by injection I.V. the drug Prochlorperazine (pro-klor-pare-a-zeen) to help eleviate nausea or vomitting which is a main side effect of chemo. I was thankful to start with that one.

That process took approximately 15 minutes and then came time for the actual chemo drug entitled Gemcitabine (Jem-Site-a-been) which was again injected through an I.V. (as seen in the photo). This process took approximately 30 minutes. During this period we took photos with my cell phone camera of the event and Trent and I had a free juice and cookie supplied by one of the many tremendous volunteers at the PMH. A third and final solution was administered following the Gemcitabine to flush the system and prepare me to go home for the day. I think Trent was as drained as I was by this time and so we were both happy to leave the hospital hand in hand.

The whole procedure from arrival to out the parking lot was 2 hours. In total we left at 9:30 am and arrived home at 4:35 pm. I slept in the car on the road home because during the ride I suddenly felt like someone had hit me in the head with a hammer and I fell asleep rather quickly. I awoke just in time to turn into the laneway.

I truly think the day was important for Trent. It demonstrated to him two very important things. First, I was not harmed in any way during the procedure which might have been a concern for him going in. Secondly, it showed Trent that I am truly sick with something and that I do need some sort of medication. You see to him, I'm normal. Up until Monday I was working and coaching lacrosse. I had just gotten home from our last NLL games on the weekend in Minnesota and Chicago and I'm not surprise my boy was wondering "how come my Dad has become so sick so fast". He now knows it's not like that. The medicine I am receiving is going to help.

You see I had a revelation on the weekend while I was asleep in Minnesota.

Suddenly in the night I woke up and I said to myself, self... maybe, just maybe this chemo treatment will work. If I believe in it and give it a chance then perhaps it will stop, control and maybe even destroy the cancer cells that are currently growing in my lungs. And that would definitely extend my life.

Before that revelation I was too focused on dying rather than focused on living. All the news I have been given over the past two years has been negative. Oh... you have might cancer but its a slime chance.. but it was. Oh.. you have cancer but we'll get the rest with radiation... but they didn't and finally... Oh.. it's back and it's not curable.... well you know what? Maybe it is... I'm going to take the positive side of the road and focusing on it is from now on and so here's to hoping and praying that this funny 11-letter word Gemcitabine (Jem-Site-a-been) is going to work. Will you hope and pray with me?

Thanks for reading and sharing...

Next Blog - Chemo treatment #2 .... May 6, 2008